Thursday, December 31, 2009

Meaning and purpose

If you know me (meaning you're actually a family member or a friend), you'd know that I'm someone who really speaks her mind. So this mommy blog will be very honest and I plan to write how I feel about this pregnancy--all the wonders and worry, the joy and, yep, all the pain in the ass! I'd like this mommy blog to be different.

OK!'s managing editor Lana Chan said she's very interested in the stories Vince and I have to tell because, unlike most folk, we never thought we'd become parents. We like kids but the thought of them didn't consume us. So Lana said this is the first time she's seen people who aren't hysterical about the whole thing and she's right--parents can be so exasperating with their "Omigod, this is the BEST thing that can happen to you. EVER! Children are the GREATEST MIRACLE! Your life will NOW HAVE MEANING! You now have a PURPOSE!"

That kind of talk really scares me and saddens me. You see, Vince and I are writers. Since we were kids, we knew we have but one mission and purpose in this life and that is to write. Write! Then I also happen to be a Born-Again Christian and I had that other great purpose drilled into me--to serve God and do His will. So my life always had meaning. It had never been empty or aimless.

This New Year, it is my hope to share with you that your life doesn't just rest on your parents, your job, your money, not even your family. Those won't last. I know this because my mother died not too long ago and though my heart still grieves, I am happy. This year, my husband's magazine, which he loved like his own child, was closed and we were devastated... but we are still happy. We lost a lot of money this year, which was a huge blow, but miraculously, we now end 2009 with more than we started it with! There is deep joy in my life, with or without the things I have because my purpose and meaning rest in my God.

God is more than enough. Everything else--my writing, my wonderful husband, my friends, my family, my work--these are incredible blessings from a God who loves me. He gives and He takes away. That is why we cannot put our purpose and meaning in temporal things. And y'all know children do one thing really well: They leave you as soon as they can!

Little Jelly Bean is an amazing gift and we'll take care of this baby and love it to bits. I also hope that we will teach Jelly Bean that he/she is a wonderful human being on his/her own and that his/her purpose in life is to use his/her talents to make this world a better place, and that it is his/her service to God and man that makes life meaningful. If we can teach Jelly Bean that, then we have done our job as parents.

So Vince and I are so cool about the pregnancy. Super chill. Like, normal. I pray for little Jelly Bean every day but mostly I forget about being pregnant because there's so much going on in my life! Hopefully, we'll still have our heads firmly screwed on when the kid comes along and it's screaming its head off! God help us when that time comes!

*Clip art licensed from the Clip Art Gallery on


  1. oh my gosh fran! I'm so thrilled. I've been so busy and out of touch that I haven't read your blog lately. Did u announce this on topaz horizon? So happy for you!!!!!!!!!!grabeh!!!!!

  2. I really don't get it when some people talk about their kids as if they're the biggest, bestest thing that has happened to them. Kids are adorable, but once they grow up, become teenagers, they can become monsters, and when they become adults, they forge their own paths and live their lives according to how they see fit. And if that happens, where does that leave the parent? If she's not passionate about anything, doesn't have an identity aside from being a mother, what is she left to do?

    Tama yan, chill ka lang. Teach your kid to write like hell, so she has something to live for. :)

  3. Hi Jill, yup, finally announced it on the blog.

    Rachel, what are you talking about kids becoming monsters when they become teens? They turn into monsters at around age 2! That's why they call that stage the Terrible Twos!

  4. True! Sometimes I get to meet toddlers who are so irritatingly pa-cute I want to strangle them! Ang sama ko no?!

  5. Now, now, Rachel... when you meet kids like that, it's usually the parents' fault they turned out that way. So strangle the parents instead!

  6. Aww so cute! I like what you call the baby --- Jelly Bean!! :)

  7. Teeyah, kasi the baby looked like a jelly bean the first time we saw it! But now it looks like a fat lizard!!! Or, as my sister-in-law says, "Alien!" But we'll keep calling it Jelly Bean till we figure out its sex and its name =)

  8. "it is his/her service to God and man that makes life meaningful" - love this line. :)

    Ngayon pa lang alam ko na, your baby will turn out more than okay. :)

  9. Hi! i love this article. I linked it in my blog. This really helped me alot. :D


This is all pretty new to me so please feel free to share your mommy wisdom!